Equal partners

I got to speak to my husband today. I love hearing his voice. We were talking about his upcoming plans with the military. As I was listening, I remembered someone talking about how their marriage as not "50-50." Marriage is a give and take. One person gives while the other takes and vise versa. However, sometimes the give and take is not always equal. Marriage is work. It is not going to simply fall into place and stay stagnant.

When I decided to return to school to earn my degree, my daughter was a year old. My husband carried the load. I was working full-time and going to school full time. My husband, who also worked full-time, became the primary caregiver. He took and picked up our daughter from daycare, he cleaned the house, did laundry (not always very well), cooked dinner and grocery shopped. After about four years, I had earned my degree in education.

Now it was my husband's turn. In 1999, Rick decided he wanted to join the military - a life-long dream of his. However, he was 27 years old. He was unsure of his decision. It was my turn to carry the load. Rick joined the National Guard - went to book camp for four months. He became a weekend warrior - however, he still was not satisfied. Right after 9/11 he joined the Army. We are now a career military family. I take the kids to school, I clean the house, I do the laundry (correctly), I cook dinner and grocery shop.

Marriage is partnership. Sometimes one member benefits from the marriage more than the other. However, as partners in a relationship each member needs to be willing to carry the load. Husband and wife working together with God's help will ensure a successful (though not necessarily smooth) marriage.